I’ve never had problems in making friends. While I hated leaving the friends I made in Delaware/Pennsylvania, the worry that plagues many people, “Will I make new friends in my new location?” never occurred to me. I realized that before I moved to that area, I didn’t know my good friends–Judy, Esther, Pat and Joyce. I was confident I would find new friends who would also become special. As it turned out, I have made more friends here in NC in 3 years than I did in the 7 years in my previous home.
I consider my friends my chosen family. I talk with them when I need support during a crisis, when I need advice and just want to “touch base.” Why then, do I also need a coach? Given that I AM a coach myself–it got me thinking about why I/we need both a coach AND a sprinkling of wonderful friends. Here’s what I came up with…
Objectivity — My coach helps me look at the situation, goal, dream or problem without imposing her values or how she handled a similar situation. It’s about what works best for me that counts.
Push/Kick — My coach knows when I am stalling, trying to weasel out of something or wanting to stay in my velvet rut where it’s nice and comfy. She is not afraid to use whatever it takes to get me to my goal. She does not hesitate to use some special techniques to get me there–with love, of course.
Accountability — My coach isn’t a soft touch that will give me a “Get out of xxx free” card whenever I don’t make my commitments. See above paragraph!
It’s all about me — It’s my time. I don’t have to wait for the polite friendship volley where we each take turns to share our opinions and stories. My coach is working toward my agenda and my agenda only.
Resources, options and new ideas — Because my coach truly understands where I’ve been and where I want to go–she always seems to have a lot of ideas I can use for my own situation.
Celebrate — Sure, I use my friends to share successes with. But it is my coach who celebrates each little bitty step that got me there. She “gets” the effort it took and makes sure I take time to acknowledge my progress.
The good news is that I don’t have to choose between my friends and my coach. They are all an important part of my life. So, what do you think? If you have a coach, how do you utilize him/her versus your family of friends?